How to Move Past P.E. Pitfalls and Amplify Women’s Strengths

BY SARAH GONSIOROWSKI

Photo by Andrew Glatt

Last week, I overheard two female CrossFit athletes discussing what they remembered from high-school gym class. They were talking about push-ups—the infamous “girl push-ups,” they called them. Because some high-school gym teacher held them to that “standard” 14 years ago: a partial-range, “that’s-good- enough-for-you” push-up. They both agreed that no one ever taught them how to do a push-up. And even worse, no one bothered to tell them they could actually do one.

Curious to learn if other women were affected by their early experiences in fitness, I polled my Instagram followers with the following questions:

1. What are your general feelings about gym class?

The most all-encompassing answer? “TRAUMA, BABE.”

2. What’s something no one taught you, but wish they had?

My favorite answer: “Women can be strong.” 

It’s true: High-school years are formative. Bodies are changing, and feelings around those changes are uncertain and anxious. But when it comes to gym class, feelings aren’t necessarily about physical activity. In other words, body image, confidence, athletic abilities, curriculum and teaching styles impact a young woman’s early fitness experience, affecting long-term relationships with movement—without actually generating negative feelings about movement itself.

In a 2005 research study by Cheryl Van Daalen, RN, Ph.D., on girls’ experiences in physical education, she asked participants to share what they thought the ideal gym would look like [or be] for girls and young women. She received answers such as, “Everyone would be getting along and feeling good about themselves,” because physical education was a source of constant shaming. When it came to their P.E. teachers, participants felt mistreatment was rooted in gender and racial bias: “I hated sitting there proving to the teachers that are guys...so what if I’m a female. I can do things that you can do. I hated that.”

Women in the Chicago fitness community that I polled echoed similar sentiments about their high-school P.E. experiences. A handful replied with a simple, “Hated it,” while others gave more specific answers like, “I loved it, but felt bad for loving it because it was ‘for the boys,’” or “I liked it until I got boobs, and then I hated it because ‘the guys are watching.’” Some got medically excused from class; some hid in the trees to avoid running a mile.

 A woman’s early fitness experience affects her long-term outlook. This might say something about why the women who responded to my poll had such strong feelings. Regardless of age, women want to be included, valued and heard—and early physical education fails to help them do that. There’s no engaging in diverse forms of activity, considering skill levels and physiology, to teach the benefits of real-life application. (Zapalski, Brady. “Keeping Girls in the Gym,” Laurentian University) When asked what they wish they would have been taught, my female followers replied:

“Going at your own pace is okay and fitness is personal.”

“How to do push-ups and pull-ups properly.”

“Women are allowed to be strong, not just thin.”

“I don’t have to be a fast runner or good at team sports to be athletic.” 

“Food is fuel and being small does not equal health.”

“How to lift weights.” 

It’s good to agree and nod in solidarity. It’s also beneficial to recall frustrations and point to action. Inequitable fitness leaves lasting impressions, but here are some ways to press on—as women often do:

Look to women who inspire you and amplify your values.

Elite CrossFit* athletes like Annie Thorisdottir and Miranda Alcaraz are changing the game for women in sport and life—and they’re talking about how to overcome shared barriers that confuse women’s approach to capability-based training. In Episode 5 of their podcast, Dottir, Annie and Katrin tackle body image issues, how social media has changed things for the worse and what the fittest people on Earth should look like. Their short answer to folks who criticize muscular women? “It  doesn’t matter what this looks like; it matters what it can do.”

Alcaraz runs Street Parking, an online platform committed to helping real people access fitness whenever and wherever they can. Her no-bullshit approach highlights life's challenges: lack of time and motivation and the daunting feeling of failure. She’s a successful business owner and mom. Fitness is her foundation, and no excuses dissuade what she believes about its benefits. 

Find a coach who tells you why.

Good trainers and coaches are teachers. They can explain the “why” behind your training and teach you the steps it takes to achieve attainable goals. These professionals will make time to connect with you before or after a training session and use different modes of teaching–like visual, auditory and tactile cues–to help you understand the answers to your questions. 

The female athletes who reminisced about their high-school “girl push-ups” weren’t frustrated by the push-up. They were frustrated because no one taught them the steps to achieve a proper one—and the time it would take to acquire that skill. Women value their time, and good coaches won’t waste it. 

Want to try something new? Train in twos. 

Unfamiliar fitness environments can feel intimidating, even for long-time practitioners. For some women, adherence to fitness means finding a community; but sometimes stepping into a new one can feel scary. If you want to experience a new class or trainer, first look to the internet. Google what you’re in for, including company values, coaching bios and athlete testimonials. If it’s up your alley, recruit a friend to join you.

Having someone by your side to navigate newness and share your experience helps eliminate anxiety. Plus, it’s helpful to have a sounding board for feedback. After training, ask your friend what they learned, how it made them feel and whether or not they’d join you again.

When it comes to fitness, we can’t erase those early feelings of doubt and inequity; but we can refocus and stop them from wasting any more of our valuable time. Training should feel challenging and attainable—and experienced, high-level female athletes and knowledgeable coaches can teach us that. 

When you head to your next training session, recall how far you’ve come—and how much more capable you feel now. You know what you want to achieve in your training, and you have other women to hold you accountable for it. If you leave the training floor feeling capable and strong, good. That likely means you’ve accomplished what someone once said you couldn’t do. It also means you found the right environment and coach, who will never tell you to do “girl push-ups,” but instead say, “Girl, look at those push-ups!”

***

*CrossFit is one of the only sports worldwide that pays male and female athletes equally. It names challenging benchmark workouts after girls and provides standards that equalize the playing field across genders.